Medic: Father, Physicist, Nazi, Lover
by Yunaman
Summary: Medic goes back in time to 1944 to save his grandfather Albert Einstein from the nazis and finds someone unexpected at Auscwitz. Has Medic fallen in love in the middle of this crysis?


Medic: Father, Physicist, Nazi, Lover

It was another boring day for The Medic who resided in TF2 headquarters with the other burly (except Scout)  
>mercenaries. Medic wondered what to do today. Should he polish his amputators again, or should he try and discover another sadistic ''medical'' procedure that would greatly benefit his team?<p>

But this day it was different. He recieved a letter from the mailman. It was old and yellow, indicating it more than a decade old. Medic asked why the mailman had just delivered this and all he got as an answer was that to letter was to be delivered today to him. But how would a letter this old know where Medic was? It was a mystery that the Medic could not leave unsolved.

He opened the letter. It read:

Dear Grandson

I am writing this letter just as I am about to be excecuted by the nazis. So I plead for your help. Inside your mattress you'll find my old time machine which I had been saving for you. I couldn't use it to escape so I want you to use it and save me. You needn't go anywhere, you just need to go back in time, because I am held in the same location as you are.  
>Set the time machine to 14th february 1944 and go and save me!<p>

From your grandfather Albert Einstein

''So I am destined to save my grandfather in the past. Then I must go!'' Medic said and went to the communal bedroom where he opened the mattress with a pocket knife and found his grandfather Einstein's time machine.

He put the time machine on a nearby table and quickly realised that the machine had a password for protection. Medic's oldman had left a password that only he and Medic could know. But what was the password.

With the Engineer's help using toothpaste, chloroform, a screwdriver and an old coffee machine Medic managed to reverse engineer the time machine and found out the time machine's secret password question that would help unlock the time machine.

However, failure was not an option. If Medic failed to unlock the machine by inputting a wrong password the machine would implode creating a black hole which would engulf Earth.

The question finally revealed itself and it was:''What is the name of the radiation created by Black Holes?'' Medic stood there for a second in silence and then declared:

''How simple yet how complex! My grandfather was ein genius! No one in Nazi Germany in their right mind would know the answer to this question, because Quantum Physics was considered jewish science and no one could use the time machine! How clever! The answer is Hawking Radiation.''

And with that medic input the password and the time machine immediately excepted it. He set the date to the one his grandfather had asked him to and waved goodbye to engie and went into the past.

He travelled 10 years into the past to the year 1944. He found himself in Auschwitz. AFter all tf2 headquarters was built over the ruins of Auschwitz. Medic had landed over a piece of Jew feces and after cleaning himself he realise that he had to sneak somehow inside.

He drugged a nearby soldier with his syringe gun and put on his uniform. He then snuck past the guards inside. Inside his virgin eyes saw all the horrors of the nazis. The horrors were so horrible that even what he saw on the battlefield was nothing compared to this. The toughest thing was of course the fact that Medic couldn't do anything about, since he would be outnumbered thousands to one.

He snuck inside the ladies sleeping hangar and there he saw her. It was the announcer! Medic was baffled. What was she doing here? Turns out the announcer had jewish ancestry and that's why the nazis wanted to kill her and turn her into beef jerky to feed the canibalistic nazi children.

He decided to save her, after all, if he didn't do it he would have no job in the future.

''Quiet! Come with me quick and don't say a word.'' Medic said and managed to sneak her past the other imprisoned women and the blond big-breasted nazi aryan bitches who were on guard.

The two hid behind several of the soap barrels where no one could see them.

''Thank you for saving me! Is there any way I can repay you?'' The 40 year old woman said relieved.

''No prob! I did what I could. It's just a shame I couldn't save everyone.''

''But, I want to repay you! How about I repay you with sex?'' The announcer asked him in her trademark voice.

''Oh,ok!'' Medic answered.

The two entered the main bulding and snuck in an office to have sex. But little that they knew that this was Hitler's office when he would visit the complex. Luckily, he was not here...for now.

''I think they'll catch us heere. Why don't we use my time..'' Medic tried to say but he was interrupter by the announcer sucking his dick.

She proceeded to pleasure him with her dry colagen-rich lips which gave him a rather weird feeling,  
>which sort of felt like an orgasm.<p>

''Stop it! Not here.'' Medic said but she couldn't hear him and she continued blowing his doctor dick.

Medic came buckets everywhere from the blowjob staining the nazi flag hanged on the wall with his cum. The announcer then pushed him on the bureau and jumped on top of him, making his erect dick enter her clammy old vagina.

She forced the Medic's dick deeper into her vagina sending waves of pleasure and disgust rippling threw the Medic's body. He struggled, but couldn't remove her from his penis. It seemed as though she were super-glued to his dick.

In the heat of the fucking she took a small statuette of the nazi eagle and shoved it up her ass, stimulating herself even further into orgasm. She forced both Medic's dick and the eagle statuette into her deeper and faster which each passing moment, until she accidentaly pushed too hard and her ass engulfed the entire statuette, which contracted her uterus making medic spill his seed deep inside her, impregnating her.

At this moment the door opened. It was Josef Mengele and Adolf Hitler.

''What iz zis foolishness!'' Hitler said angry.

Medic quickly jumped into action and shot the Fuhrer with his blutsauger, killing him instantly.

''Ha ha! I have killed Hitler!'' Medic said.

''Not so fast!'' Mengele retorted ''Do you think I would risk bringing the actual Fuhrer here? This is merely a clone from a long line of clones I created to boost troop morale. Plus this clone is weak and a prototype. The new generations of clones can do much more. They are super powered uber-  
>Hitler who can destroy all! YOU STAND NO CHANCE!'' Mengele yelled.<p>

He then pulled a small box from his pocket that said ''Instant Hitler in a box. Just add water!'' and opened it pouring a white dust like substance on the floor and then tried to pour water on it.

Medic quickly tred to act and assaulter him amputation his leg off with the Ubersaw. Both struggled in a pool of blood and doctors to seize control over the saw. Mengele's Colt revolver fell out of his pocket during the fight. The announcer then picked up the gun and pointed it at both doctors.

''Which one of you is the real Medic?'' She yelled.

''What kind of stupid question is that? It's obviously me.'' Medic said.

''Yeah! It's him. What are you stupid? And people wonder why we nazis hate jews.'' Mengele said.

''Don't try to fool me! Both of you are sadistic german doctors, known for your cruel experiments.  
>I can't tell you apart!'' The announcer said almost panicking. Her eyes were dilated.<p>

''It's me, Woman! You just fucked me, how can you no- AAHH!'' Medic was interrupted by the announcer shooting him in the shoulder with the revolver in the shoulder.

''YOU, WHORE! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?'' Medic yelled as his shoulder bled all over in puddle of blood and the left over semen from the fucking all over clone Hitler's corpse.

''Ughh! I'm sorry!'' She said scared ''I couldn't tell you guys apart.''

''Give me, the gun!'' Medic yelled.

The announcer dropped the gun in Medic's arms which initiated a new struggle, this time for the revolver.  
>The struggle ended quite quickly with Mengele as the Victor. The gun was now in his hands and he was going to kill both Medic and the announcer.<p>

''Say, goodnight, Herr Doctor!'' Mengele said and just as he was about to pull the trigger he was stopped dead in his tracks.

At that time the nazi eagle exited the administator's ass half-covered in shit and richocheted off the floor hitting Mengele in the face which broke his front skull and lodged itself into his brain killing him. Just as he died he managed to spit on the Hitler colne dust which made the dust grow into a uber-Hitler clone.

But something was wrong, the spit made the clone mutate into a midget canibalistic Hitler called mini-Hitler. It lunged at the two and bit the announcer's leg.

''We need to run away quick!'' Medic said and grabbed the administrator dragging mini-Hitler by her leg which left a trail of blood everywhere.

The announcer used her high heels to goucge out one of mini-Hitler's eyes, which made him scream like a siren alerting all nearby nazis about their pressence.

They both ran through several corridors being chased by mini-Hitler and the nazis, until eventually they hid in a room where Albert Einstein was writing the letter Medic had read to attempt this trip into the past.

''I knew you'd come to save me.'' Albert said glad that his grandson had arrived.

And with that Medic, the announcer and Einstein opened the door to escape to Medic's time machine which was parked outside. But as they opened the door they hit mini-Hitler who had taken a detour in order to eat them. Opening the door they hit him and he flew back falling inside a crate which closed trapping him. The box was labeld ''To Bavaria''

They finally reached the time machine having narowly escaped the nazis and activated it, however, it malfunctioned sucking the announcer and Einstein into a portal.

''NOOO!'' Medic yelled as his grandfather and the announcer were sucked into the portal.

He tried fixing the machine as best as he could in a few seconds and used it to time travel to the present, just as he had left. The machine broke as soon as he arrived, beyound repair.

''What happened, Doc?'' The Engineer inquired curiously.

''I almost saved my grandfather, but the machine malfunctioned and he and the administrator were sent in time unknownst where!'' Medic said crying manly tears of regret.

''Waddya mean? She's right here. Why don't we ask her what happened.''

And with that the two went to her announcing booth and asked her what happened.

''I knew one day you were going to ask me this, Medic. So I kept it a secret until you asked me.  
>I...I...am your mother!''<p>

''WHAAAAAT?'' Medic was shocked.

''Me and Einstein were sent to the 1920s. There I gave birth to you and took care of you until the nazis threathened us. Einstein then invented the time machine and you to the future. We couldn't go with you, because the nazis caught us and then you saved us.''

''This is impossible! Then how come-'' Medic was interupted

''I am Albert Einstein's daughter. My real name is...Mina Einstein. When we were in the 1920s I located myself from that time period and left her to take care of her future son, while I time traveled with you to the present and integrated you in my aggency, paid for your medical training and made you a mercenary so the governement won't suspect anything. I kept this secret all this time. Is there something you would like to ask?''

''Uhhh! No.'' Medic left flabbergasted.

FIN


End file.
